We met standing in front of a mammoth Buddha figure in Beijing, China during the Women's World Conference in 1995. Two black women with dreadlocks and flowing tears. In that speechless moment, Marlene managed to ask: Do you meditate? I said: Kinda. Within short time, we discovered we both lives in the Bay Area.
She invited me to Spirit Rock and my formal meditation practice was launched. In that moment I knew I was home. For years, we discussed racial ignorance in spiritual communities and our aspirations of healing the wounds that divided us. We shared how difficult it was to keep our hearts open and how much the dharma helped.
I remember the first time Marlene invited me over for tea. It was a hot Summer afternoon. Her home in Sausalito was breezy and smelled of cinnamon. She had soaked sliced red apples in fresh spring lemon water. She served them on a white plate accented with yellow rose peddles. She offered the plate gently as if in slow motion, with a big, proud smile, as if she had thoroughly enjoyed every moment. We sipped chamomile tea and ate apples for what felt like a long time before speaking. We talked at length about our children and mothers, and whether our service was aligned with our hearts.
Marlene invited me to join her on Spirit Rock's Diversity Council, so I did. At her request I attended the first African American Meditation Retreat at SRMC. And at her instigation, a small collective of Women of Color met for 10 years with Jack Kornfield to dwell in the dharma dance of our day-to-day lives.
Marlene Jones passed away January 8, 2013, surrounded by family, friends, and her beloved teacher Jack Kornfield. In those last moments of her life, I'm told that Marlene was gently asked to offer a sign of presence and tears began to roll down her cheeks, and I was reminded of the first time we cried together in the presence of the Buddha, and I prayed that she was seeing the Buddha and once again offering her tears.
Marlene has never been far from what matters to me and to so many of us. She will be remember as a sangha sibling, a Heart Soul-jer, and a devotee to justice. May we all know intimately the purifying and unifying power of tears. Transition well, my spiritual friend, transition well. Ruth
~~~
Death offers an exquisite gift to the living. Consider the following as a New Year's Resolution:
- If you had one year to live, what would you do?
- If you had a month to live, what would you do?
- If you had a week to live, what would you do?
- If you had a day to live, what would you do?
- If you had an hour to live, what would you do?
- If you had one breath, what would you do?
Ancestor Marlene Jones was a teacher, professor, mother, devoted community member, and a woman committed to justice, diversity, and respect for all. She was a public servant, educator, and a visionary. Most important, she was a pioneer in our Buddhist communities.
A most beautiful tribute to a gentle, powerful, and much-loved sistah. May her peacful transition comfort those who will miss her.
Ruth,
I’m so sorry for your loss. I remember you talking about your trip to China when we were in India. Blessings, Your sister Cindi from Portland Maine
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL TRIBUTE TO AND REMEMBRANCE OF YOUR FRIEND. I, TOO, HAVE EXPERIENCED THE BUDDHA IN CHINA AND CAN IMAGINE THE POWERFUL SPIRITUAL CONNECTION YOU AND MARLENE SHARED THERE. MAY HER SPIRIT ALWAYS DWELL IN YOUR HEART, RUTH.
So lovely, Ruth.
Thank you so much. I remember when Marlene joined our Sangha at Cazul and how instructive her presence was for us all. She came with many gifts! And left in beauty. Marlene, sister, presente.
Peace and blessings,
Alice
Beautiful. May all beings be blessed with such a spiritual friend. Peace
I am touched by the depth of your connection.
thank you for sharing what is in your heart.
blessings
Willow
I have been forever changed by Marlene. I met her at the first people of color retreat I ever went to at spirit rock. Her warrior, gentle spirit soften my heart for issues I have no control over but could rise above. As an ancestor she will forever be the “Guardian Angel” of Black Women who Meditation or are on the road to peace.
Thank you Ruth for sharing your beautiful story of meeting Marlene. When we meet in a spiritual place with spiritual intentions our friendships have the opportunity to grow to the deep kinship the two of you had…..what a blessing! I went with Derethia to the People of Color retreat and met Marlene….all I can say “what a wonderful Human Being”. I am fortunate to have crossed her path.
This tribute rings true like the bell… leaving a peaceful calm vibrating long after the reverberations have quieted. I can feel the love, Ruth, and see your caring face savoring the essence of your friend’s beautiful life. thankfully, Nancy
Oh, how your beautiful writing of this wonder*filled life has touched my soul. As more and more of us begin to grapple with our own impending death, your tribute to your spiritual friend, and experience of and wishes for her leaving her body, allow us all to become a little bit more wiser. Wow – thank you and thank the Buddha (both one and the same) so very much,
Narayani
Dear Ruth,
Thank you so much for sharing this lovely story and such a beautiful tribute to Marlene. It is through your story that Marlene and I embarked on a heartfelt friendship. You honored me by sharing the story of how you and Marlene met when we had lunch on a sunny day in Berkeley while we were attending the Mindful Schools advanced curriculum training last year. I had just volunteered to assist Marlene at the Daylong for Women of Color at Spirit Rock so was very touched by your warm remembrance of how you met her. I then shared this with Marlene and she was truly touched as well. Hence began a deeper connection with Marlene which was quite glorious. She and I had a beautiful dinner together only 3 weeks before her passing. I was very shocked and saddened to hear the news. When I returned to the annual Daylong for Women of Color this past weekend, I strongly felt Marlene’s presence on the land, in the air, the trees, the rocks and infused all throughout Spirit Rock. She was smiling and at peace and that essence of her allowed joy to fill my heart. I also felt her urging to continue the work that she and I were putting into action – creating a retreat for African-American women. I wish to name this retreat in her honor. I will be grateful for any insight, input and collaboration that you feel called to offer. With much love and gratitude, Melissa
What a beautiful friendship, Ruth. I’m grateful for that moment in Beijing – it brought the dharma into my life and to so many others with the commitment you both have made to embody these teachings.
Thank you,
Bita
Such beauty, a woman of gentleness, grace and tenderness. I learned and learned I did by watching and she told me lots. May she be received with love and welcomed home.
Felicia